Love and forgiveness

I am working on a study of Hebrews right now and I had an epiphany the other day when I was working through chapter 8.  The book that I am using has you read the chapter and then has you answer reflection questions about what you read.  The questions were as follows: What do you expect from a friend when you ask for forgiveness?  What can we expect from God when we confess our sins to him? How can you remind yourself that God has forgiven you and does not hold your sin against you?  Why do we sometimes doubt God's forgiveness?...and the questions go on, but in answering this last question is where God opened my eyes to a truth that I have always known, but have never connected in the way I did a few days ago.  When I was answering the question about what I expect when I ask forgiveness of a friend, my response was that it depended on the friend from whom I was asking forgiveness.  If that person was a person who tended to hold grudges or harbor hurt feelings, then I knew there would be a period of awkwardness and feelings of guilt and frustration.  If it was a person who had been hurt many times (maybe even by me) and found it hard to trust people, my mistake may cause a barrier in the relationship that would have to be removed over time to renew the trust.  Then when I got to the question about God and what we can expect from him when we ask forgiveness and why it is easy to doubt God's forgiveness, there was the obvious answer.  God will forgive us when we ask, because the Bible tells me so and I doubt his forgiveness because I equate my relationship with him with my relationship with others.  But then as I sat and thought about it, an even bigger truth sprang into my mind.  It was a verse from 1 Corinthians - and it is not verse 5 that says "Love keeps no record of wrongs", though that applies here too.  It was verse 6, "[Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres."  And who is God?  God is love.  One of the reasons we have trouble showing forgiveness to one another is because, frankly, it is hard to trust someone who has hurt you.  But it is against God's character not to trust us.  He trusts us, even when we feel like we cannot trust ourselves.  He hopes for us, even when we feel like we are hopeless.  So when we ask for forgiveness, he doesn't think, "Yeah, yeah, I'll just wait until the next time and I bet you'll do it again."  It isn't that God is naive, he just knows us and he trusts us.  He knows our hearts and our motivations.  Whenever I am not sure if my heart is really wanting to be redeemed from a sin or if I am going through a difficult relational issue or if I am going into a situation where I may be tempted to sin, I concentrate of the last verse of psalm 19, "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight...".  But really the entire chapter is one of those that I find myself returning to again and again.

Psalm 19

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

 ¹ The heavens declare the glory of God;
       the skies proclaim the work of his hands.   
² Day after day they pour forth speech;
       night after night they display knowledge.
 ³ There is no speech or language
       where their voice is not heard.
 ⁴ Their voice goes out into all the earth,
       their words to the ends of the world.
       In the heavens he has pitched a tent for the sun,
 ⁵ which is like a bridegroom coming forth from his pavilion,
       like a champion rejoicing to run his course.
 ⁶ It rises at one end of the heavens
       and makes its circuit to the other;
       nothing is hidden from its heat.
 ⁷ The law of the LORD is perfect,
       reviving the soul.
       The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy,
       making wise the simple.
 ⁸ The precepts of the LORD are right,
       giving joy to the heart.
       The commands of the LORD are radiant,
       giving light to the eyes.
 ⁹ The fear of the LORD is pure,
       enduring forever.
       The ordinances of the LORD are sure
       and altogether righteous.
 ¹⁰ They are more precious than gold,
       than much pure gold;
       they are sweeter than honey,
       than honey from the comb.
 ¹¹ By them is your servant warned;
       in keeping them there is great reward.
 ¹² Who can discern his errors?
       Forgive my hidden faults.
 ¹³ Keep your servant also from willful sins;
       may they not rule over me.
       Then will I be blameless,
       innocent of great transgression.
 ¹⁴ May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
       be pleasing in your sight,
       O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.