Christmas Letter 2012

Every year at Christmas, I mail a letter to those family and friends who live away from us, so they can hear what we are up to, even if we don't get to see them often. I have shared the letter on my blog the last couple years, for my readers and for me to keep a copy separate from my computer, in case my hard drive would crash and I wouldn't have a copy of it anywhere else (which happened about 5 years ago!). I sent the letter along with this picture.  For my local friends, they just got the picture, since most of them have been living life alongside of me and know most of the information in the letter anyway.

Dear friends and family,

Every year, I attempt to think of a theme for the year. This year’s theme is mercifully uneventful! It is not that we didn't do much or have unexpected things pop up occasionally, but in comparison to the fairly turbulent years before it - with our travel to Peru & Guatemala, some injury & sickness, & unexpected deaths among family & friends - this year has been pretty calm in comparison. I thank God for a year of uneventfulness!

We began the year, as all our years begin, with Bella's birthday. She turned 6 this year & is a smart, beautiful girl. She excelled in kindergarten & is continuing to excel in 1st grade, though it was a tough transition at first. She is not only academically smart, but she has an analytical mind that helps her to solve problems & often gets her into trouble! She gets bored sometimes in class & gets reprimanded for deciding to do her own thing! She loves jewelry & dress up, but often has her own sense of style! She can be head strong & has a bit of a temper that we’ve had to help her manage. She loves to write and act like a teacher. Sometimes she writes on things she shouldn't! She has mastered her father's knack for disorganized organization. In fact, the clutter around her desk was the one thing her teacher mentioned at her parent/teacher conference. Bella took dance in the Spring, which she loved. She really did well in the class and she’ll probably try it again in the future. 

She and Elias both took swimming lessons over the summer at the local pool & turned into little fish! They both are now comfortable in the deep end and Elias learned how to dive! He was so proud. I think the kids spent the majority of their waking hours in water this summer. We even capped off the summer with an impromptu trip to Ocean City with a friend whose family lives in Delaware.

Elias began basketball in November. He really enjoys basketball. He thinks he’ll try soccer again in the Spring. He loves playing sports, but he doesn't like competition. As he gets older, competition becomes more a part of the sports, though. He would love to try football or wrestling, but Josh and I have held off on those, partly because of the time commitment & partly because of the rough nature of those sports. Elias would probably do well at both sports, because he is very strong with broad shoulders. He’s almost as tall as me & can almost wear the same size shoes I do! He is doing well in school & always has buddies around him. He has a big heart & is just plain fun to be around. He always seems to have a joke or a good-hearted prank to play. He often gets in trouble for talking in class, but his teachers always compliment him for being kind hearted. 

In the Spring, I began substitute teaching for the county school system here. I work about 2-3 days a week on average. It is a great job to have for our phase in life right now. I am able to be home when the kids are home, minus a half hour at the beginning and/or end of their school day, and I don't have to call off when they are home sick or have a day off of school. I enjoy being in the classroom & have worked mostly in the elementary schools. It provides me with something to put on my resume for future employment and a little extra income, without having to be tied down to particular schedule. I am still very involved with Compassion International and with our church. I have worked many concerts and events this year for Compassion and I have been helping in the children's ministry and women's ministry at our church. My life is very busy, but it is very fulfilling to know that I am able to use my gifts and talents, while still keeping my job as mom at the forefront.

Josh is still working at the same job. Even though he works 40 hours a week at his job, he still considers being a husband and dad his first priority. He coached 2 teams both the Spring and Fall soccer season, as well as playing on a local recreational team himself. He has been involved with the men's ministry at our church, as well as maintaining the web site, and other technically-related jobs. He and Elias have been enjoying having "guy time" and he takes Bella out for daddy/daughter dates. He is baking with Bella in her new easy bake oven, as I type this!

We want to wish each one of you a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! We are thankful that we have so many family and friends and wish there was more time to visit with and talk to each of you.

Josh, Jennifer, Elias and Isabella Wilson

Christmas Fun Questions

My friend Jill posted these questions and her answers on her blog today. I thought it would be fun to answer them too. If you decide to post these on your own blog, let me know so I can visit!

1.       Eggnog or hot chocolate?  I like both, but can only handle egg nog in small doses.  I have hot chocolate all year long, because I'm not a coffee drinker, but it feels extra special at Christmas time.  I have recently discovered Coldstone hot chocolate.  Do yourself a favor and pick up a box!  It is the best packaged hot chocolate I have ever had.  It is even better with a little milk added.  Just don't expect me to drink Wassail!  That stuff smells great, but the taste does not live up to the smell!

2.       Colored lights on tree/house or white? I would prefer white, but the kids and Josh out voted me, so we currently have colored on the tree and a mixture of white and colored outside.  It may not be pretty, but it is festive!

3.       Do you hang mistletoe? No. We used to, but our little sprig started to look decrepit, so we threw it out. My grandmother used to have this beautifully ornate ball of mistletoe that they hung right above the entry into their living room.  Since they were elderly, it was one of the few decorations they put up.  It felt like a Christmas tradition to see that mistletoe and try not to get stuck under it with an uncle or cousin.
        

4.       When do you hang your decorations up? Usually the weekend directly following Thanksgiving.
       

5.       What is your favorite holiday dessert? Pumpkin pie and pumpkin cake - the pumpkin pie must be my mom's recipe, piled high with whipped cream and the pumpkin cake has to be my mom's thick cake covered in homemade cream cheese icing. I will eat others, but it just isn't the same.
      

6.       Favorite holiday memory as a child? We had a disco ball type star that would cast moving reflections on the walls around the tree.  I would sit for so long just watching the magic of the lights twinkling in the dark living room. One year, my dad made me a complete kitchen set out of wood. He built the entire thing by hand. It had a stove, refrigerator, and sink.  The sink was a real stainless steel sink (a camper size) surrounded by a real Formica counter top. The stove had a door that opened on hinges and there were real metal oven racks inside. I remember coming down the stairs to that sitting around the tree and thought it was my dream come true. I had no idea that my dad built it because he couldn't afford to get me one from a store. It was so much better than anything he could have ever purchased and the time and attention to detail that it took him means even more now that I'm an adult. It was so cool and lasted not only through my childhood, but 3 nieces.

      

7.       Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? It's changed over the years, but currently we open one gift on Christmas Eve and it is pajamas, so that the kids can sleep in them and get their Christmas morning pictures taken in a decent set of pjs!
     

8.       How do you decorate your Christmas tree? Colored lights and ornaments without any theme.  They are a mixture of gifts, homemade ornaments, and things we've purchased. Because of the memory, my favorites are a set of "12 days of Christmas" ornaments that Josh and I got at Dollar General. We got married in April and the January before we got married, the dollar store was clearaning their ornaments. I really liked the "12 days of Christmas" ornaments, but they were in this huge clearance bin with tons of other ornaments.  Josh and I spent over an hour scouring through the bin until we had found one ornament for each of the 12 days of Christmas. Knowing he would take the time to satisfy a silly desire I had to have these ornaments meant so much to me! And he continues to do those types of things, even today. We got a little ceramic ornament of a fireplace with stockings that we took gold paint and wrote on it "Our First Christmas".  Even though I love that ornament too, because it reminds me of our humble beginnings when we couldn't even afford a real "First Christmas" ornament, I always love the memory of us searching that bin together for something that seemed to be one of the first building blocks to our marriage.

       

9.       Real tree or fake?   Fake. I am allergic to pine! Even if I wasn't, I don't think I would want the mess of a real tree and I would feel bad about throwing it out at the end of the season.    

10.   What is your favorite tradition?  Since our kids are small, we are sort of just beginning to make new traditions. One thing we have began doing that I love is advent activities. It helps to remind us all that Christmas isn't just a one day thing, but Jesus' birth and the way we celebrate has immense significance.  One of the kids favorite things to do is to deliver cookies to the neighbors. When they were small and thought the dough was play doh, I would instruct the neighbors quietly that they didn't have to eat our rock hard, misshapen products!
    

11.   What tops your tree?  An angel. I wanted an angel when we first got married, because we always had a star growing up and I loved to go to friend's houses who had angels. Now I think I would like to have a star again, but the kids really like the angel.
      

12.   Do you prefer giving or receiving? Giving and receiving - if the gift is heartfelt and not just given to fulfill an obligation. The best gifts I have received have been gifts that showed the person paid attention to something I said or liked and I love to be surprised by a gift.  I used to be a terrible gift receiver, making such a huge deal saying, "You shouldn't have!" and feeling guilty over the cost or the fact that I didn't get anything or something as nice for them, that I made both me and the giver miserable.  As I get older, I have learned to humbly and thankfully receive gifts.
     

13.   What is your favorite Christmas song? That is a hard one, because I love Christmas music. I love the old style - Bing Crosby, Nate King Cole, etc. - and traditional church Christmas songs the best. I don't normally like any new Christmas songs.  About the only Christmas song I like from the last few decades is Breath of Heaven.

14.   Candy canes? I like candy canes, but don't normally eat more than one - and I usually eat it in pieces over a period of time. I only like the peppermint ones, though. I think the other flavors are mostly gross!

15.   Favorite Christmas movie? That's another hard one, because we watch lots of Christmas movies! We have the classics like Frosty, Rudolph, The Grinch who stole Christmas, Charlie Brown, and The Little Drummer Boy, but we also have new ones like Veggie Tales, Hermie, Punchinello, and the Grinch. Ones that I personally like to watch every year is "White Christmas" and the 1990s version of Miracle on 34th Street. I don't watch the Hallmark movies or any of the current made-for-tv Christmas specials.

16.   Do you have a Christmas morning tradition? Open presents, let the kids play with their stuff for a while, and then get ready to leave for my hometown.
     

17.   Shop online or at the mall? Used to be almost exclusively the mall or Walmart.  This year, we bought a lot on Amazon, mostly because we now have free 2-day shipping.

18.   What is on your Christmas wish list? I gave the kids a list of things I wanted, so they had an idea of what to buy for me, but there is nothing I need. Really a safe, healthy holiday with family is the best gift I could get.

19.  Snow?  Love it or hate it? I love snow on Christmas and I love it when we can stay home and not have to get somewhere. I hate driving in it! Even though I don't like the cold, I would rather have snow than not.

20.  Favorite holiday food? My mom's stuffing (which if you want the recipe, it is measured in "a couple dashes" and "until it looks right") and my sister's yeast rolls. Those are the things that make my mouth water when I think of our holiday meal.
        

21.  When and how did you find out the truth about Santa? What do you mean? What truth about Santa? LOL... I remember when I was probably 9 or 10 sneaking to the top of the stairs and watching my parents carry out the gifts from their bedroom, which was on the bottom floor.  I had had my suspicions before, but that confirmed that mom and dad were Santa.

 22. Favorite Holiday Tradition as a child.  There were several. But eating was always involved! There is one priceless Christmas tradition that I now miss so much, since my grandparents passed away. On the evening of Christmas, after all of us had celebrated our Christmases at home, we would go to my grandparents' house in the evening and all my uncles, aunts, and cousins would be there.  We would sit around sharing old stories and the cousins would show off new toys and gadgets to each other and we would laugh and have so much fun.  My grandparents always bought meat and cheese platters and everyone would bring their leftover desserts.  Then my grandfather would go get the envelopes - the money envelopes that each person got - even those who were just married into the family.  I don't even know how many envelopes they had to get from the bank by the time my grandfather passed away, but it was over 50 for sure. My mother had been one of 8 kids! It was so exciting to think about what we'd do with our little windfall and I appreciate their gift now as an adult, knowing that it was their way to show a little love to each one of their huge family. 

A new holiday for the Wilsons?

Everywhere I go, I keep getting asked the same question, "Are you ready for Christmas?" Of course, the question really means, "Do you have all your presents purchased and wrapped, your Christmas pictures and cards sent out, etc.?"

The question bothers me more than it should. No one has ill will when asking it. It isn't like anyone is purposely trying to push the spiritual meaning out of the holidays, but it still saddens me.

I have thought in years past about doing as Ann Voskamp has done and do away with gift giving entirely on Christmas and only give gifts to charity and of time, etc. I have never been brave enough to take that leap. In years past, we have been pretty conservative about buying for the kids.  Three to five gifts and that was all.  This year, it seemed there were just so many things that I wanted to get the kids. We didn't get them large things. The most expensive things were only around $30.  But we got them many things, about 7-10 each - much more than usual.  But it was because it brought us joy to get them things we think they'll enjoy. 

On top of that, I want the kids to start being generous and thoughtful to others, so we made a point to take them out shopping to buy for their grandparents and us. We've done this before, but this year, we wanted to make sure they knew what giving good gifts to others really was about. 
 
Now I am in a conundrum. I don't want our Christmas to be about the gifts, but we have quite a few of them! We haven't broke the bank or made poor decisions, but I feel conflicted. 

On one hand, I want to celebrate the joy of giving and getting gifts for others.  On the other hand, I don't want Jesus to be covered up by the wrapping paper and packaging!

I think we need a separate gift giving holiday or something!  It doesn't help that poor Bella's birthday is right after Christmas.  After all the hoopla of Christmas, her birthday is usually shoved to the back burner and thought about just days before.  Every year I think that I need to start planning ahead more and every year I don't seem to have the time!

I think we are going to just have to move the gift giving holiday to sometime in February, right-smack-dab between the kids' birthdays (Elias' birthday is in March).  Then we'll all have a joyous birthday extravaganza, without all of my Christmas gift-giving angst or my mommy guilt over not having plans for Bella's big day!

It shouldn't have bothered me

I subbed yesterday. It was the first time since the school shootings occurred last week. I thought that it wouldn't effect me. I am just a sub in a school hundreds of miles away from where the incident occurred.  I told myself that letting it effect me was just giving into the drama that the media and politicians, with their talk of gun control and problems with psychiatric care, want to create.

My kids had already came home talking about the drills they had at school and Bella complained about not being allowed to go to the water fountain and bathroom by herself anymore - they are only allowed to go as a class now.  I saw a local police officer who had come to talk to the kids coming out of the school, as I went in to pick my kids up early.  I thought I was prepared to sub again.

I arrived at my post to sub for the librarian. I thought how prepping for this day felt like any other, except there was this electric in the air, like everyone was on high alert. I thought it was just me, but then the librarian put the keys to the building into my hand, the ones normally kept in her desk drawer when I was there, and said, "Keep these in your pocket at all times, just in case you need them." I am sure she meant because of the fact that they have stopped letting people in the locked doors. Subs don't normally have keys to the buildings, so we normally rely on another teacher to let us in or go around to the front door, if we have to leave the building during the school day. But before I could stop it, a vision of me herding kids into the storage room at the front of the library and locking them in against who-knows-what came flashing into my mind and made me sick to my stomach.

As my first class came piling into the room, I thought about what it would feel like to go from trying to get them to stop talking and sit in their seats to trying to save their lives in less than a minute, while realizing that I may never see my own kids or husband again either. I looked into their faces and wondered how anyone could look into the faces of elementary school kids and take their lives from them. It had to be pure evilness. It had to be.


I thought about the kids who may have had a fight with one of the students who will never return to school again. How do you explain that it is okay to a child? Those kids have had their innocence shattered and the community stands stunned, everyone broken by it, few if any are untouched. With 28 dead in a small town, there are few that would not have been related or been friends or acquaintances with at least one of the victims or their family.

I thought about how a person starts getting troubled enough to do what that 20 year old did and what his extended family must be dealing with. The families of the victims get sympathy. The families of the accused gets hatred. Yet, we all know that there are members of his own family who wonder how things could have went so wrong, while mourning the lose of his mother, who will be forever held in scrutiny regarding how she handled this boy who became a monster on a seemingly normal December morning. I wonder how many of them think, "I saw something like this coming, but never this bad. If only I had done... or if only she had done...."

I didn't think that it should have effected me, but it did. I didn't want to have all these thoughts rush at me on my own normal December morning, but I just couldn't help it.

God help those who are left behind in this tiny town in Connecticut, who have to try to find a new normal as media scour their town and question their citizens. As politicians and sensationalists try to take advantage of the situation to further their own agendas.

God help us all to remember that life is like a mist and God still loves the world.

There is tragedy everyday

In light of the tragedy in Connecticut, we all wish we could do something for those families who have lost their precious children. 

We really cannot do anything for those families, but pray.  But their are children all over the world who are needing help today to keep death from knocking on their door.  They may be facing starvation, sickness or malnutrition.   More than 9 million children under age 5 die each year. Two-thirds of these deaths — more than 6 million every year — are preventable.

Many parents have to watch their precious little ones suffer and die and they can do little about it.

But you can...

It isn't too late to provide a gift from the Compassion Gift Catalog.    For just $40 you can provide for the needs of one child who is registered in the program, but has yet to be sponsored for up to 3 months. For just $4 you could protect a child from deadly parasites that make food impossible to give the nourishment that a small child needs. For $13 you could provide emergency feeding to a malnourished child. You could provide where there is the most urgent need for care for just $30.

These are just some of the options.  It only takes a few minutes to make a difference and show that you realize that all tragedy doesn't occur in a few minutes on one day.  Tragedy happens every day when children die from preventable causes.

Christmas Randomness and other stuff

This month has been an odd one!  It has flown by and yet seemed to last so long all at the same time. There are so many things left to do for Christmas, yet there are so many other things weighing on my mind. The weather has seemed more like Spring (except for today) than winter.  It feels too soon for Christmas to be here and yet several Christmas activities have passed or will pass soon, like the kids performance at school.

I have work to think about. This is the first Christmas season I have had to work since the year after Elias was born. It has been getting more commonplace, but definitely is different than recent years when my time was all mine to allot.

I have several friends who are really going through some tough times. I have acquaintances who are also struggling with different things. It is hard to think about being merry when I know so many people cannot be this season. 

The kids are growing fast. When I switched the kids clothes from summer to winter, I had to switch out Elias' kids hangers for adult hangers because his clothes were getting too big and falling off.  Both kids were able to wrap their gifts to each other and us this year.  It makes me happy and sad to see them growing so much, especially at Christmas.  In light of this thought, we gave in to the "Elf on the Shelf" craze. We decided they'll only be young enough to enjoy that sort of thing for a little while longer.

The kids have been hearing stories of their classmates' elves and Bella went to 2 friends' houses who had elves.  One elf even made muffins as a special treat since Bella was visiting. Bella was telling Elias all about it and she concluded with, "Elves are good bakers!".  Elias said, "Elves don't bake!" Josh said, "What do you think the Keebler Elves do?" Elias said, "Who are the Keebler Elves?" (We don't eat a lot of cookies here and the kids hardly ever see commercials.)

I had begun wanting to buy them an elf a couple weeks ago, but it seemed crazy since we don't really push Santa with our kids and only one of our kids' presents comes from Santa.  But I realized the kids don't care about him reporting back to Santa and all that, they just like to find out where he will be next. 

Josh and I had talked about getting an elf several times, but he said they were creepy and expensive. The night before last, Josh came home and said we could get one, but only if we named him Chucky. So we went to bed and I thought I would pick one up the next time I got to the mall. I woke up to this.

 I have to admit, it was a little creepy, but it was so sweet for Josh to surprise me with him. I felt like a kid myself!

We hid him away before the kids saw him and that night, we put him by the computer where he had typed out a message to the kids.

The kids were so cute. They were talking to him and talking about him all night. We decided to name him Charlie - with Chuck as a nickname!  After we read the book and talked about him for a while, we did our advent activity, which was to read about the 12 Days of Christmas and sing the song.  Josh and I were being goofy and singing obnoxiously and Elias said, "I'm embarrassed to have Chuck meet our family!"

This morning he rode back in on our reindeer. This picture was taken before I decided to put him by the computer.  The letter that I ended up acting like he had typed is sitting in front of the book.
 

We have to do our advent activity for the evening and it is getting late. Tonight the kids get to eat candy canes, so I think they'll enjoy this one! There have been a couple that the kids haven't enjoyed so much! I will have to revamp some of the activities next year.  I don't mind if they are a little indifferent to some of the activities, because they are still just small kids, but I don't want them to hate doing them either.

After they go to bed, I will have to rack my brain to figure out where Charlie will turn up next, which was my biggest hesitation about getting an elf!

When Gifts Fail, Giving Still Wins

I can't figure out how to make this image bigger, so if you'd like to read the original, go here When Gifts Fail, Giving Still Wins