Uncle Tom's Cabin

I just finished reading "Uncle Tom's Cabin".  I know some of you may be thinking, "Did you just enter a 10th grade English class?".  But I never had to read it in school and I was interested, since it was obviously a classic, well-read novel.  In fact, I looked up information about the book and author and found out that it was the second best-selling book of the entire 19th century, second only to the Bible.  That is pretty impressive.  Since most classic novels are free for the Kindle, I decided to take the opportunity to read it.
It is a difficult book to read, both in language and content, but well worth the read.  I know there have been many arguments about whether this book was wholly positive for the African-American population.  But I felt that Harriet Stowe's representation of all facets of slavery, by having several characters who were in varying opinions, social stations, and levels of civility or depravity, was very just and effective in showing the complexity of slavery.  But I think the lessons learned through this book could be applied to many social injustices that have occurred ever since this novel was written - and really every year before.  All the problems in the world today and since the beginning of time boil down to selfishness and pride and fear.  It may wear different faces at different times, but it is always there.

Reading books like this makes me want to strive to be a better person.  I want to practice what I preach and be in my heart what I say I believe with my mouth.  I want to know that my faith in God is not dependent on my comfortable position in life and that I have the courage to stand up for those who are suffering injustice.


James 4:1-10

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. Or do you think Scripture says without reason that the spirit he caused to live in us envies intensely? But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:

“God opposes the proud

but gives grace to the humble.”

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

Mzungus for Ritah

This is Ritah.  She is in the Leadership Development Program in Uganda.  A fellow Compassion advocate, Dawn, was in Uganda over the summer and met her.  At the time, Ritah didn't have a sponsor, but quickly stole the hearts of all those who were on the team visiting from the states.  From what I have heard about her, she is fun and kind-hearted.  When Dawn came back she wanted to find Ritah a sponsor, but since sponsoring an LDP student is $300 a month, she found it difficult to find one person who could commit for the duration of her college education.  So Dawn decided to ask people she knew to consider joining a group of others to work together to fund her education. 
Ever since I visited Peru and had dinner with LDP students, I had a desire to sponsor an LDP student one day.  I never thought it would happen so soon!  So Ritah is now a part of our Compassion family.  I cannot wait to interact with her.  Our relationship will be my first African international relationship and my first with a young lady who is closer to adulthood than childhood.  I am so excited to begin to correspond with her.  I have mailed out my first letter to the leader of our "Mzungus for Ritah" group.  This is the name we have decided to call our little posse.  Mzungu is the Ugandan word for foreigner or loosely "white person" and those who visited said that the little kids would run up to them or call to them in the street using the term. 
Leadership development is so important in these countries.  It is essential that young people have access to education and opportunities to make real change in their communities.  LDP students are the ones who can effect change and are already positive role models in their communities.
Today is election day in Uganda and there have been threats of uprising and discord.  So far, it has been peaceful, but I ask anyone willing to pray for Ritah's country.  There has been unrest in the past.

Things I don't like about blogging

I have a bad habit of going back to re-read my posts when someone posts a comment about them, since I have my settings so that it requires me to go into the post to publish the comments.

So the other day, I came into my last blog entry and re-read what I had written.  I cringed. The biggest problem with blogging is that people read what you write, the way you wrote it.  Now there are several issues that I have with this.  First, I saw that there were several grammatical errors.  I know everyone has these occasionally and I doubt anyone thought poorly of me because of them, but it just drives my perfectionist nature bonkers.  The second thing I noticed was that what I wrote made it sound like I was a martyr in giving to the needy, which is SO FAR from the truth.  There is not ONE THING that I need that I do not have and there are many more things that I don't need, but I wanted and, therefore, I own. Third, since people are reading a static word and not referencing my body language, expressions, and attitude, sometimes meanings can be misconstrued or misunderstood.  Something that may have been intended to be humorous, could be seen as arrogant or rude.  Also, by writing about any subject it makes you somehow sound like the authority or expert on the subject.  We can all thank our teachers who told us to state our opinions, research findings, or thoughts in direct ways with solid sentences in papers throughout our school years.  I am no expert or authority on any one subject.  If my writing makes me appear that I am, then I am deceiving you.  Many of the things that I write about are things that I am wrestling with the answers to myself.  Lastly, you cannot control how people feel about what you wrote.  I read the blog, "Stuff Christians Like" and one of his blogs was picked up by a national syndicate.  The comments from those who share different opinions on Christianity and his perspective were brutal.  I couldn't even continue reading them, so I can't imagine the turmoil I would have felt if those people had been commenting on something I had written.  What I thought was a very clever, thought-provoking, comical post, others viewed very differently.

With all things considered, if I am to continue my blog, which I would like to do, I must give myself a little grace.  I must give my readers the benefit to take it or leave it, and, hopefully, think none the worse of me for it.  And I can also offer the same grace to others who I may read out in the blogosphere.

Do you ever ruminate on your old blog posts?

Despicable Me

I have a confession to make.  I am a very selfish person who likes things done my way, I want things that I want now and not later, I think that I can justify my wrongs and should be praised for my rights.
If I were left to indulge my selfish self daily, I would be quite a egotistical and despicable person - and often I can be.  People sometimes tell me differently, but I know the truth of what lives inside of me.  The sinful nature in me just waits to wrap its vines of device around me.
Since I volunteer for Compassion, I really think that there are a few people who believe that caring for those who live in poverty or being willing to sacrifice my wants or needs for them comes naturally to me.  I hear all the time, "It is great that you are doing that, I don't think I could."  Believe me, I didn't think I could until I was placed in a situation where I had to make the decision to do it and I know that I really could do more, if I chose to do so.  But little nagging thoughts tell me that "I deserve this" or "I need that" or "Everyone else is getting this" or "Even they are buying that".  We look at people like Mother Theresa or missionaries who give up everything, even their own lives, and think that God must have given them a better strand of Spiritual DNA than He gave to us. But the older I get and the more of God's people with whom I am acquainted, the more I realize that it all boils down to choices.  I have to choose to do what I know is right and the most beneficial, even if every bit of my will wants something different.  Sometimes I allow myself to fail and sadly can easily excuse it away. Sometimes I can succeed and foolishly pat myself on the back.  But in the end, God doesn't want me to even judge my own actions.  The Bible even says, "But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." Matthew 6:3-4
I get asked on occasion, "Are you and Josh on staff at the church?", which can be often be translated as, "Do you get paid for being nice to me, introducing yourselves, leading the youth group (or whatever we did that caused them to raise that question)?  The answer to the translation is no, we do not get paid.  But I have been known to answer on more than one occasion to the first question, "No, we don't get paid.  But we are on staff, and you are too.  Since this church is God's house, if you are a Christian, you are a part of his staff - whether you have just walked in the doors of the SRC building for the first time this morning or have been here from the beginning.  Because our job is to represent God, not just a church community.  So my job here is to represent God to everyone I come into contact with and help them in any way that I am able, whether I hold any position or title or not." (I usually get quizzical glances or blank expressions when I say this, so I have to resist the urge sometimes!)  But we think of people who are "professional Christians" (as our pastor jokingly refers to paid church staff) as being the ones who should call a person who you know is hurting or lonely or to be the one to help them figure out the nursery procedures or to know how to handle an awkward or sticky situation. And then we wonder why people don't feel loved or get frustrated in the church.  It is because it is ALL of our jobs to be God's hands and feet and we shouldn't expect the church staff to be the ones to serve others in the church.  Church staff members don't get handed super-human abilities with their paychecks.  They have sick kids, ailing parents, bad days and forgetfulness, just like everyone does.  They aren't given a ticket to an easy life, so that they can be free to serve the needs of their church. And their jobs are not only "shepherding the flock", but being sure that the bills are paid, the copies are made, and the lights and heat get turned off, etc., etc., etc. 
So we should all consider ourselves as "professional Christians", because whether we are doctors, secretaries, or a stay-at-home moms, our jobs are to be a living and active member of the body of Christ and allow others be the same to us.

Valentine's Day

We decided to celebrate Valentine's Day this weekend, since Monday is Monday and doesn't offer a very relaxing backdrop, with school and work and all the other Monday madness.  Last night Josh and I went to a Jazz band performance and dance at the Bridgeport Conference center.  It was different than what we would have normally done (dinner and a movie or a trip to the book store) and the food was excellent.  It was served buffet style and I told Josh that I was glad that I didn't know how good the food was when I was getting it from the buffet, because I surely would have gotten more than I did originally and overate!  We didn't do much dancing, since we aren't really versed in jazz dance moves, but we had good company and it ended up being a lot of fun. And I won a box of chocolates.

Today Bella got to take out her piercing studs for the first time since getting her ears pierced for her birthday in January.  She was so excited to replace the studs with loops.  She thinks that loops are much more grown up.  It just so happened that the date she was allowed to remove them intersected with Valentine's Day, so we told her that she could choose what earrings she wanted to wear to go on a special date with her daddy for lunch.  Of course, she picked Subway.  That is always her choice.  We got Elias some Beyblades.  If you are not versed in the world of boys' toys, they are metal tops that you put in a circular arena and the top that is the last one spinning wins.  I have to admit, it is pretty fun.  On the cartoon, the characters say, "Let it rip!" when they pull their rip cords to set the tops spinning.  So, we have had plenty of chuckles in our house today surrounding that statement!  Elias chose to go out to Burger King for his date with me.  I really didn't want to eat at Burger King, but, luckily for me, Burger King and Subway are right across the street from each other, so we went with Josh and Bella to Subway, I got my sandwich and then Elias and I ran across the street to Burger King.  By the time Bella and Josh got over to Burger King, Elias was finished his lunch and he and Bella played in the playplace for a while.  Since we just bought the Beyblades themselves and not the arena to go with it, Elias wanted to go to Walmart to buy the arena.  He has been trying to save his allowance for a little while to get them.  But because he had not raised enough money to get either the blades or the arena, he and Bella agreed that they would both put in $5 from each of their allowances that they'd saved up to buy the arena together.  She enjoys playing with them as much as he does. So we went off to Walmart to get the arena and there have been many epic battles since we've returned!

"...Mourn with those who mourn." Romans 12:15

When I said I would be writing more, I never thought I would be writing the blog I am about to write...
A very dear friend died suddenly this morning of pneumonia.  It started as an everyday illness and just a week later, she is gone.

She has left behind a husband that loved her deeply and two 20-something children who respected, loved, and depended on her greatly.  She was so full of life, smiles, love, and care for everyone and everything and it seems unbelievable that she is no longer here on this earth.

She and her husband were some of the first people who we made an intimate relationship with when we first moved to Fairmont.  They have helped us in so many tangible ways, many only us, they, and God know about.  My family eats around the dining room table that they gave us and Bella's clothes set in the dresser from their bedroom.  They gave it to us when our rickety dresser fell off the dolly while they were helping us move into an apartment that they helped us find.  These are just two of the tangible ways I remember her kindness.  But the biggest, but least tangible, way is their relentless emotional support and love.  We are not the only ones that she has helped in uncountable ways.  She was like that to everyone.  She was a surrogate mother and sister to so many.

My heart grieves for her husband, children and siblings.  She was like a glue that held everyone and everything around her together.

I feel like I have no outlet to express adequately how her life and death have affected me.  So here is my attempt, as feeble as it is, to pay tribute to such a beautiful, Godly person.  "...mourn with those who mourn." seems like such inadequate statement right now.

monthly prayer calendar

I know it has been eons since I wrote anything on here and probably the majority of you have long given up on reading anything.  I have purposely taken a sabbatical from over-communicating.  I can't really define what over-communicating is, but I know I was doing it.  It goes hand-in-hand with being too "plugged in", which I have also been taking a little sabbatical from as of late.  There were several blogs I had been reading of people I didn't know personally.  Even though they all were full of good things, I felt overwhelmed by all the time it took to read, the ideas I didn't have time to do myself, and the way it took me away from reading things that I may have enjoyed more.  So, I unsubscribed and haven't missed them. (I also felt this weird competitiveness with these people, many of whom are 'professional bloggers', and I don't even want to be a professional blogger!)
But today, I just got an idea of what to do with my monthly prayer calendar that I get from my church and wanted to share it.  If you don't get one from your church, there are many of them you can find on the internet, or you could make them yourselves.  Basically, each day you pray for a specific need.  If you would like to pray for the needs of people in every nation, I have just discovered www.operationworld.org.  This site emails you details and prayer needs of a different country every day. I have never even heard of some of the countries I am praying for until now!
Anyway, back to the monthly prayer calendar.  It is the length of a regular sheet of paper, but on card stock, so it is stiff.  I normally post it on my fridge, but I will forget to look at it for days and then try to play catch up with all the prayer needs when I finally get around to looking at it.  But recently, I had it in my planner with a bunch of other papers that I needed to go through.  I needed to clean off the kids masterpieces from the fridge to find room to post the calendar there.  But what I discovered is that the prayer calendar makes a perfect page marker for my planner and since it is right with my daily "to do" list that I check out every day, I actually look at and pray for the needs listed.  I was excited about this discovery and wondered why I have not thought of it before.
I have been writing lots of blog posts in my mind over the last couple months.  I do plan on writing again.  After such a long time not posting, I am not quite sure where to begin again!  Maybe one or two of you will still be out there to read it.